Notes on staying close to people

A practical answer, not a guilt trip: why you keep losing touch with people you actually like, and a small system for staying close to them without turning your friendships into a to-do list.

There isn't a number, and the search for one is usually guilt in disguise. What actually determines how often is right, and a rule of thumb that works better than a fixed schedule.

Why reaching out can feel transactional even when it isn't, what actually makes a message read as genuine, and the one phrase that quietly ruins more reconnection texts than anything else.

The problem was never meeting people — it's what happens three weeks later. A minimal system for actually following up, for people who find the word "networking" a little exhausting.

"Relationship manager" and "CRM" get used almost interchangeably in search, but they describe two different jobs. Here's the actual distinction, and why it matters for which one you should use.